It’s time to be honest.
College is tough. The transition, new habits that are bound to form, and utter sadness of the freshman fifteen.
Those two words can take away joy and turn it into a long uphill battle between Satan’s lies and your worth. The words can turn into yourself looking in the mirror and thinking “What have I done?” It happens. It happened to me.
In high school I was in shape for the most part. I was playing softball everyday after school, being very active, and felt motivated to go for runs. (Yuck!) I thought it would carry on when I got to college. I would keep my same eating habits – hamburgers, fries, milkshakes, pizza, you know the favorites. My body started to change into a woman and my metabolism dropped off the face of the earth. For a while and still sometimes, it’s tough.
There are some things that girls do that tear us down without the help of any outsider.
- We look in the mirror and pick apart anything we dislike.
- We compare ourselves to the beautiful Instagram models.
- We listen to Satan and his chatter in our ear telling us lies.
I did all of those things every single day. It’s still taking me time to understand that this is okay, this is where God has me, and He is going to bring me through this with His mighty power! One thing I find myself rooted in is found in Genesis.
Genesis 2:25 states: “Adam and his wife (Eve) were both naked, and they felt no shame.”
They felt no shame.
One thing we don’t know is what Eve looked like. Was she a size 2 or 20? What color hair did she have? Was she full of freckles or blushed cheeks? We don’t have a clear description of her. What we do know is that she walked around naked with no shame. She stood in awe of her Lord, knowing she was made in His image. She embraced it.
How many times do you look in the mirror and embrace your flaws? I know I don’t do it enough. I try and change my focus, which can be the most difficult part of it all.
Instead of complaining about my nonexistent thigh gap, I remind myself that the Lord gave me powerful legs to run fast, feel strong, and teach others it’s okay not to have one.
It’s okay to not have everything put together in this moment. What’s not okay is to push away and throw a fit. Embrace the excitement. Embrace the struggles. Embrace the journey.
Find the worth in how big your heart can be on fire for Jesus and not how big your shirt size is. Focus on the number of times you felt God’s presence and not the number on your jeans. Learn from the amount of love you feel from the Lord and not from the amount of likes you get on Instagram.
Your joy should not come from outward beauty it should come from the true joy you find in Jesus.
“Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of gentle and quiet spirit which is great worth in God’s sight.” 1 Peter 3:3-4
So here’s my point. It’s okay to treat yourself, go on a rollercoaster of highs and lows, and learn about yourself along the way.
Just please promise me something sis, don’t lose your worth. Don’t fall short of feeling the joy that comes from Jesus. Love coffee, the Word, and yourself.